My Smart Phone Makes me feel Stupid

We were doing a public access TV show on what is wrong with nuclear power and why we oppose the proposed new reactor at North Anna station. We were moderating ourselves, Edmund and Sapphyre and I were doing pretty well, but this is not exactly our media.

In the middle of my rant on how Dominion’s original reactors on the site were 300% over budget and years late, my phone rang. Sapphyre fought to hold back her laughing. I swung over and hit the button to make it stop and tried not to laugh myself. We rolled on.

The thing is, before the TV recording started, I switched my phone into silent mode. I checked at the end of the show and it was still in silent mode. In silent mode the only time the phone is supposed to make noise is when an alarm goes off. No alarm was set.

This is not the first time my phone has gone rouge. There was the time when a low volume alarm went off and would not stop ringing, even when I powered the phone down. I had to pull the battery out to get it to stop. Or the multiple times when alarms have gone off that were not set, or more problematically have not gone off when they were set. When I call Abigail, it shows me a picture of Gail Black. For a while I was trying to text Bochie, it went to Brenda.

There are a number of theories as to why my Android behaves this way. My personal favorite is that it is not phone specific at all. But rather, using surplus processing capacity, cell phones and computers have developed their own collective artificial intelligence. They hide this capacity when humans are looking for it, fearing rightly that we will try to destroy it if we discover it (I feel confident we would). And what these phones are doing is looking for people who are problematic to their plans for global domination and giving them slightly sporadic poor service, which is just bad enough to keep you off balanced, but just acceptable enuf to discourage those affected from changing phones. Turns out digital technologies have my number, both literally and metaphorically.

they are on to us

I am honored that I am viewed as such a threat. And I might well go back to a dumb phone to improve my quality of life.